By conventional definition, every engineer is a geek. By conventional definition, every person who manages to study his way into fooling an impossibly skewed filtering process is a geek. By conventional definition, a geek likes his workbench(computer) and knows how to use it.By conventional wisdom, a guy falls in love with a girls, dates and marries.
But if you are an iitian, none of the conventions hold true.According to some disenchanted iitians,if male female ratio is 991, our number starts from 992, the guys for whom God refused to make a girl assuming pairs are made in heaven. There are few who managed to buck the trend. But for many it is the reality of life. To give you a clearer picture of what I am trying to say let me elaborate more on the curves of the background. If as a matter of exception you(reader) happen to be a girl, please do take offense to the use of word "curve" for the only curve we are familiar with are the ones on our computer screen.Well I was trying to draw parallels with the strokes of a painter on his canvas.
Coming back to the point, we spend most of our times in front of our computer. so we definitely know how to use it. Computers and the lan is our lifeline. Movies,gtalk, music,games and occasionally for some work - we run to our computer to satisfy all our needs(pun intended).But we refuse to call all of them geek. for us a geek has to like linux and ha to hate windows. I shall not justify the reasoning behind why we chose such a convention. But among other things, peer pressure, ease ranks high. for me though, it is freedom from virus.
So, now I have established that we geeks in kgpland hate windows. Now returning to the title of my post. according to one of fellow iitians, all girls who are open to the idea of having a boy friend already have it. And while the rest of mankind used their precious college life to follow conventional dating wisdom, we dream and day dream of a never land where male female ratio is more than 20 :1000. so, I extended the hypothesis, that now that we are about to reach heaven, we shall be rewarded for our misfortune thus far.But then where are the promised forty virgins.So, i set my sights lower and I realised that breakups among couples are gods apology to singles like us.Justification:
1) We wont be a party to it.( we are singles or we know that we wont get a second chance)
2)Girls open to having boy friends will be single.
3)Girls will be most vulnerable and hence we can sympathise our way into their hearts in this window of opportunity,
Boy, we do love break ups.
DOGA !!!
ReplyDeleteI sense you are hinting at certain someone.
Are you ???
Aich Aich !
but who ?
very insightful first para... and very optimistic last line....did u just have the last word in something doga? :P
ReplyDeletewell all hope is not lost... vry iitian rather kgpian hopes one day to leave the comfort of his computer behind to follow the path to unknown consequences beyond his door
ReplyDelete@ ani no yaar i hope my page has not yet ended for otherwise the lat word is sad
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ReplyDelete@anubhav...
ReplyDeletekoi nahi bey...try try n try until u die...but atleast try my friend...
@doga...
awesome post...sahoo has taken ur post to his heart and has decided he will remain single till death...
@all others...
doga ko koi bandi dila do yaar...
Very Nice one... tells all about us.... I am still confused about my affinity towards girls... but I wish not to die as a geek .... a sweet husbands tag looks cool :)
ReplyDelete@shobhit sahoo i know you can do it.
ReplyDeleteDOGA ko bandi ki sakht zaroorat hai
ReplyDeletekoi dila do yaar
@doga itna fruust naa hoiye
bas do months aur bache hai
Very nice post DOGA..but frustt hone ki koi baat nahi hai... :)
ReplyDeleteBtw..most of the comments on the post are from geeks similar to you....
Hum chale 'khajoor' khane :P
a post by geek of geek and for geek.
ReplyDeletehahahahahah... the conclusions are awesome :D
ReplyDeleteDoga, Linux shall rule the world
hehehe , tht device in tintin was used to crack glasses .... so at max it will allow u to crack ur compu screen whose curves are ur sole comfort :P
ReplyDeletesample conv you might agree with:-
Jihadi :- Wow, is that my arm their ?? And is that my leg ? You mo@#$%f*&%%#$ dog, leave my di@# alone. Anyway, nevermind. Awesome scene ...wow i killed a LOT, Jannat, here i come. Man am I horny.
Allah :- O god (rolls eyes), here's one more. To Jihadi :- Welcome. Here's your starter kit in heaven ... this folder contains a few CDs, there's a comp in your room, enjoy.
Jihadi :- Goes to his room muttering to himself ...."What shit, no LAN !!! I need CDs ???!!! Pathetic. I miss chatting with my Jihadi buddies :("
Rushes out of room in a towering rage. Spots Allah and controls himself with great difficulty... forces calmness in his voice and says ...
Jihadi : Allah, the CDs u gave me are ... umm... really not very ... ummm exciting. I have seen better. But I was thinking, now that I am done with researching explosives and finally out of hiding, maybe I won't be needing CD's anymore. Can I have a few of those 40 .... ummm .... ladies you talked about.
Allah :- (Rolls his eyes and becomes a bit angry) See thats the problem with you guys, some a-holes tell you 'be a Jihadi, die for the cause and you will have all the 'pleasures' '. And you were naive enough to believe that. Where the fuck (Allah will NOT be censored, well known fact) am I going to have all those 'virgins' for you ? You think I have got a pu#$@y (God fears feminists) factory or something ? My best works have already been snapped up by smarter people who weren't cooped up in small rooms researching for ways to kill people. While you were hunting for money to buy bombs, they went ahead and hunted ... umm ... the ladies(looks uneasily over his shoulder for those damn 'ladies' Jihadis who take objection to such reckless objectification). Now look where that got you, you have all the bombs in the world (but ofcourse not as many as US, u cannot beat US ever, no matter how good a Jihadi you were), and yet here you are begging me for some action. (Long sign after looking at Jihadi's almost tear-stricken face) Okay baba, I will look in the bag and try to find something ....
Allah comes back accompanied by a 'lady'.
Allah : This is all that I have.
Jihadi: Bullsh@$. I have seen way too much action on CD's and I am sorry my standards are higher now. You shove these 'available virgins' up your black spotty arse (Allah is not Caucasian, so I am sorry about that). I might be horny but I can't disappoint my dick after all these years.
Jihadi angrily stomps off..... and is back in his habitual depression after 5 min. And now that he has scorned Allah and the 'available virgins', THAT door is firmly closed. Jihadi has much to think about his past decisions in the coming dark years.
Srry for the few typos tht crept in.... haven't been typing english for quite sometime now
ReplyDeletethe views of iitians even after leaving this place. Well this is about jihadis. but for simple people like us who have simpler aspirations. 40 is for jihadis, we are no jihadis nor are we looking for some seconds of ecstasy that is easy picking in the times of economic crisis and certain modern day ghettos you dont need to kill anyone for it.. a thing about iitian is that allah in some form or other will probably get us a bride. Thank God there are arranged marriages in india for the same reason.But that is mediaval. The point is will we ever date;maybe no But we are accustomed thus far to fighting for getting what we like not begging for and expecting someone to hand it to us.But but We can draw some parallels that is what most people here fail to understand nothing can happen to iitian even if he has left this place. He shall forever remain frust.
ReplyDeletethe culprit is easily idetifiable. LAN. W/o it ppl wud have atleast got off their asses to go see chicks in cities more often and some of those excursions possibly would have given positive results. Instead we have our head filled with fantasy women. I am sure even the married/ the one with gf iitian guy will be fruust. He will nevr be able to fulfill these fantasies tht hav filld his mind from all the excesses seen on LAN. After all, the gal in Q has not spent the crucial yrs frm 17-22 in a place with a gal to boy ratio of 30:1 and the wife/gf wud obv refuse to fulfill thm. I wish some twisted person would set up such a social experiment. Coop up 900 gals in a village with 30 odd guys... Then sit back and study. The mind boggles at what such an experiment might turn up
ReplyDeleteSome one said the only thing that does not change is the continuance of change at this point of time I blindly believe the above statement.
ReplyDeleteand finally let us not loose hope no matter how hard it is. Let us wait for the elusive break up window.Let us pray that depravity do not turn us to actual pervs.
ReplyDeletewats wrong with computers??? you can always format them when they are troubling you..... that isn't the case with human beings :P
ReplyDelete@ biswa sour grapes. sour grapes but funny though almost entire geek squad of ktj has comented on the blog. :)
ReplyDeletereally cool piece of satire ...
ReplyDeletemasto doga ..... :)
ReplyDeleteI know whom ur pointing at in the last lines .. :P
dekh all iitians are equally unfortunate so it might appear that a few lines are for a particular person but they are not.
ReplyDeletei love break ups...they have so much drama and the bitchiness that follows...do u ahve a particular brk up in mind ?? agar hai to chalo lets do it :D
ReplyDeleteawesome post..tells truths of our life...
ReplyDelete@DOGA... i know you are here for last five years, but don't be so frustrated...now you are going to heaven from this hell and you will get more than 40virgins :P